DAD WITHOUT A MAP’S GUEST LIST: What I Wish I Had Known Before I Became a Parent

DAD WITHOUT A MAP’S GUEST LIST: What I Wish I Had Known Before I Became a Parent

By Adrian 

Listening to Daddy's opinion? Whatever next!
Listening to Daddy’s opinion? Whatever next!

Hold on to your hats!-  here’s something a bit ‘out there’: a man’s perspective on this parenting lark.

Brilliant Daddy Blogger ‘Dad Without a Map is a) Father to gorgeous Baby B (honestly he is  seriously cute) b) bucking the trend*. Rather than grumbling or ranting, he has been writing about the positives of parenting; even singing the praises of toddlers.

Here’s his list of ‘Things I wish I’d Known Before I Became a Parent’:


  • That babies sleep a lot when they are new. But not when you want to sleep.

  • But you will be more tired than you thought possible for at least six months.

  • That having children isn’t the end of your life. 

  • I’d become THAT person who posts about their child on social media all day. And starts a blog. What a cliche.

  • That most midwives would barely acknowledge your presence in the room let alone ask your name.

  • That what they tell you in ante natal classes about birth plans may well not work out – be ready for it.

  • That poo came in more shades of yellow green and brown than a Farrow and Ball paint chart.

  • But some baby poo wouldn’t actually smell that bad (is it because we’re related?)

  • That I wouldn’t be completely useless at looking after our baby.

  • And that he’d grow into a toddler in the blink of an eye.

  • That incredibly I’d still get to go on boys nights out at least once a month (caveat – I don’t think this is a universal one just in case any dads to be reading this get too excited)

  • But that hangovers mixed with a 6am start mean I wouldn’t really want to get drunk.

  • That I’d feel so much younger once I became an older dad – even though I thought I’d have less energy.

  • Babies are great if you can’t be arsed to go to the gym. ‘Have you been working out? No, just carrying a screaming toddler up and down the stairs all day.’

  • That baby food really is as disgusting to look at as I’d feared. Still feel a bit sick thinking about pureed chicken and veg.

  • But they soon move on to finger food and you can steal their home made fish goujons.

  • That sonographers could get the sex of your baby wrong at the scan!

  • But it doesn’t matter because boys can wear babygrows with little duckywucks on too.

  • That some people will think your baby’s name is odd and won’t be very good at hiding it.

  • And you should never discuss names before the birth. 

  • That once the initial buzz about the birth is over it can be quite dark at times – so look out for each other.

  • That all those hours you spent feeling bored should have been cherished. Because once you have a baby you’ll still be bored but never have time to think about it.

  • Did I mention new babies are quite boring? But toddlers are great fun and I hope the trend continues.

  • That there are emotions you’d forgotten you could feel and new ones you’ve never experienced.

  • Because you thought you’d been in love but you’d never loved someone more than life itself.


• Susie Verrill wrote a great piece about this phenomened. Here it is: http://mymiloandme.com/2015/09/eugh-kids/

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